hat a contradiction that is.
I have always felt as if I was alone. When are born with one foot in the world of Mankind and the other in the world of the Fae, you never really belong fully to either. It’s rare that either side wants to count you among their number. There is always that small unspoken nuance found behind a smile or a glance that strikes a pang in your heart.
You know that they doubt you as one of their own.
My mother died when I was not yet three years old. My father was always, shall we say, rather….uninvolved. When such is your life, even at a very young age you learn very quickly that you have to rely on your own instincts and Self for survival. Even when someone does step forward and offers you a hand or care and succour, you learn that those persona cannot always be trusted. There is a saying that I have never forgotten: Put not too much trust in any friend. My foster-mother, Morgienne was clear evidence of this sentiment. She cared for me as a young child, but it was only later that I learned it was by her own hand that my mother met her demise – and so by mine she met hers.
When I was older I met others who accepted me in varying degrees. There was Nuada, and Jareth. and there have been others of the Fae as well who are as kinsmen. But always we did a complex dance that sometimes borders on thinly veiled mistrust. Such interactions are often akin to being alone.
It was perhaps a few days after I came to Tombstone to help my Uncle Angus run his ranch, the Hacienda Las Glorias. I was walking through town and there was a tall, lean man, handsome as could be. He was not looking at me, but I admit he caught my eye. As I was nearly even to him on the street, he quickly turned, running headlong into me. His face flushed and he was quick to apologize.
“Pardon me, Darlin.” he said.
“I donnae mind,” I gave a small laugh, “No harm done.”
“Sure was clumsy of me,”his voice had a slight drawl of someone who was not quite from the South, but certainly not of Western origins. ” My name is Johnny Ringo, and you are?”
“My name is Frances Moira MacKay.” I said, I’m Angus McLeod’s niece. But ye can call me Fanny Fae if you like.”
I smiled up at him the moment those green eyes met mine. I fell in love with him in that the moment, and I knew that I was not ever going to be alone again. From that day forward our conversations have never stopped. Two months later, I married him, and I have never felt more assured that I was not going to ever be alone again.
Fandom: Original Character / Folklore / Mythology
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One response to “When in your life did you know you were not alone?”
I write to Fanny now.
Trail-blazing is a lonely profession. I think that people, such as yourself,-born of lineages that are multi-cultural/national/racial and in your case -species,-are fated to be just that.
It helps (at least for me it has) to realize that you have been put be fate, God/Diety/Netjer or by whatever name you use- to be a citizen of the world or in your case multiple worlds and realities.
The path you tread now will help those who follow you..
and some will follow.
The lessons you have mastered will make their lives that much easier.
The act of giving meaning to that period of your life when you felt very much alone- even in the midst of crowds- can take away some of the sting of the pain that such perceptions create and perpetuate.
Thank you for sharing a part of your life with us.